拍拖容易分手難
結婚容易離婚難
君不見鋒芝戀, 話結婚就結婚; 話離婚, 咁聰明的人, 也要攪到驚天動地。
(1) 神聖的婚姻本是一個鄭重的承諾, 不過:
「短暫」是一個大道理, 誰都不敢去寫包單。 一定白頭到老, 永結同心。 就是百般唔願意, 但去到不能容忍的程度, 想必是離婚/分手的時候了。 誰也說不準。
但是為了尊重一紙婚書, 我們必要作出非比尋常的承諾, 就是長相廝守, 天長地久。 疾病困難, 都要一起同心度過, 相扶相持。
但, 心底深處, 你又不能不抱有合則來不合則去的想法。 明知可能是「短暫」因為生離死別什麽突發的情況都會發生。
(2) 不離不棄就好了, 是天性:
畢竟, 大部份的人, 安份的人都情願無風無浪, 直到永遠; 否則會造成不好的回憶。 因此情感上, 真真的想"得過且過", 無什太大的波折, 隻眼開隻眼閉, 豈不一樂也; 「不離不棄」就是最好的了。 撫心自問, 這並不是因為一紙婚書的原因, 而是每個人心底下的慾望。
心當然是希望長長久久, 但又意識到是短暫, 因為連自己也無法去掌控, 這一生, 你會跟誰一起過。 噢, 多矛盾啊!
因為拍拖時, 而放入的承諾和心機。 分手破壞的美好的回憶, 好令人傷心啊! 美好的回憶我們喜歡, 痛苦的回憶, 我們又不能抺去, 怎生是好呢? 共同生活得愈久, 要抺去的時間就愈長, 成為一段黑暗日子。 不想多想, 不想去想, 但它卻是實實在在的存在的。 你抺不去, 也不知如何去處理那段時光; 笑好還是好。 悲憤莫明。 去想它呀, 還是不去回憶呢? 只有苦惱。 空餘恨!
基於以上的矛盾, 有人把同居變為合理化, 似乎更為不合理! 違反自然的渴求!
(3) 祝願留住美好的回憶在腦海裏面:
那些前輩把這一句掛在口邊:「珍惜當下。」 珍惜身邊的人, 因為你不會知道下一秒會發生什麽事情。 或者可以這樣理解: 不要花時間去追悔過去, 也不要為未來的生活太憂心太忙碌。 現在擁有的, 要重視, 免得沒有的時候, 追悔。
有一個朋友, 竟然問我: 「珍惜當下, 是什麽意思呀?」... 怎麽說呢?
我發覺我較愛沉醉回憶, 數算過去的日子。 我想珍惜當下, 目的是為了: 「要盡力諦造美好的回憶, 讓日後回味。」 所以, 不離不棄, 在這裏是有其意思的!
無論是吵架的日子, 冷戰的日子, 發脾氣的日子; 晴朗的一天, 還是炎熱的日子, 暴雨的時候, 還是寒冷的季節。 那倒都是好日子, 因為今日大家都平平安安的。
我不能不相信短暫, 但也深信永恒, 因為回憶這傢伙是長久永遠地保留著。 怎樣也抺不去。 跟其他地球生物比較, 這是人類的獨特之處。
~~~~~~~~
Relationship is over - 7 signs (added on 18/5/2012)
Sign that it could be over 1: Incompatible goals for the future
They say that opposites attract, but when you want children and your other half panics at the mere mention of parenthood, or your partner wants to immigrate to another country and you want to stay put, this kind of opposition can cause a problem. Whilst it's possible to work through such mis-matched goals and reach a fair agreement that both parties are happy with, sometimes it's hard to do that without thwarting your – or your partner's – dreams. Perhaps the most unhealthy thing you could do to your relationship at this point is try to persuade one another to sacrifice future plans in order for you to stay together. Not only is this selfish, but more often than not it leads to feelings of resentment between you and your other half, which often results in a break-up anyway. If there's no compromise and you feel as though your plans for the future are being jeopardised, it's probably best to part ways for the sake of your freedom and happiness.
Sign that it could be over 2: Sneaking around
The key to a great relationship is honesty and trust, so if your partner is sneaking around then it defeats the object of being in an intimate relationship and you need to tackle the problem head on. Go about it carefully though; following him/her into town to 'catch them in the act' only to find that they were purchasing your surprise birthday present could lead to all sorts of complications, and you don't want to risk being the embarrassed guilty party. Instead, it's a good idea to communicate with a secretive partner to make it clear that you've noticed they're up to something and you're offended that they couldn't talk to you about it. If you still feel like your other half is up to something, it might be a good idea to call it a day on your relationship as the trust barrier has clearly been broken.
Unhappy couple after an argument
Sign that it could be over 3: No special gestures
After weeks or months of being wooed by your other half in the early stages of a relationship, when the dust begins to settle it can feel as though Cupid has disappeared off the face of the earth and suddenly you're stuck in a relationship rut. We're not expecting to be swept off our feet and taken away to an exotic island to be showered in expensive gifts, but many couples often lose sight of the small romantic gestures that make the relationship feel that bit more special. If special gestures are sparse in your romance, this by no means suggests that it's over; you may just need to make a little more effort to be romantic – suggest more things to do together and the problem should be resolved in no time. However, if after a conversation you realise that all romantic gestures have stopped because you no longer feel as strongly for your partner as you once did, this is a sign that your relationship should come to an end.
Sign that it could be over 4: You can't seem to leave the past in the past
Relationships where the past can't seem to be left where it belongs are often a recipe for disaster. If you're having an argument, respond appropriately to what is happening here and now, not what happened six weeks ago. Granted – past issues can cause an underlying problem in the relationship if they are never spoken about, but once a problem has been addressed it's time to move on from it. It's a common deal-breaker in relationships to keep bringing up past issues during an argument to use as ammunition against your other half. If you can't learn to forgive and forget – or your partner can't learn to forgive and forget a mistake that you have made – then it might be time to cut all ties and start afresh.
Sign that it could be over 5: You're constantly bickering
Arguing is a natural way to get things off your chest and emphasise what's upsetting or annoying you to improve your relationship in the long-run, but when things have soured to the point that you spend more of your time arguing than not, it's often time to raise the red flag. Healthy relationships are about having good conversations and being happy when you're around your other half, not constantly being surrounded by negativity and feeling angry or upset. Don't be tempted to stick together when all you do is fight; as easy as this is to do, you will end up feeling even more miserable in the long run. Read more on realbuzz.com...
